Oh, My bad

by Ashley on November 12, 2014

in Uncategorized

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“Did I hit you?  My bad?”, “Your name isn’t Corky?** My bad”, “Ham not bacon?  My bad”,  “A little girl, not a boy?  My Bad”

These two little words make my blood absolutely boil.  No matter where I turn, what the situation, I can’t seem to escape them.  They’ve come in like a plague and they are part in parcel to the destruction of our manners, our accountability. 

What ever happened to “I’m sorry”?

There’s a difference you know, between “My bad” and “I’m sorry”, it might not seem like it but there is.  To say you’re sorry shows remorse, it requires humility & it acknowledges that you not only did something wrong, but that you regret that it has hurt/offended/injured the person you’re saying it to. 

To say you’re sorry means you feel bad for the outcome.  You say it to take responsibility for your actions and often times it is the first step in repairing the damage that’s been caused.

Now, think about being on the receiving end, being the person who’s in need of the apology.  When your feelings are really hurt, hearing “I’m sorry” can be almost soothing.  It can mean the difference between a destroyed relationship & a mended one, a chance to open up, to talk, to fix it not trash it. 

There’s a humility found in saying “I’m sorry” and an accountability that allows for us to move forward.

Let’s take that same hurt, that same situation and instead of the offender saying to you “I’m so sorry I hurt you” they say, “Oh, my bad” how does it make you feel?

To me it’s cold, while there might be a little remorse in the eyes, quite often it’s missing, as is the accountability and emotion.  There’s no chance to feel connected, there’s no soothing of the hurt, just a flippant comment and a chill in the air. 

I’m a firm believer in taking ownership for our actions, the great ones and the wrong ones.  I apologize when I believe I’ve done something that has caused another pain or upset (I may not always be sorry for what I’ve said, but I will be sorry that how I said it hurt.  We don’t always have to agree but we do have to try to be gentle) not because I feel like I have to but because I want to.  It has nothing to do with “being Canadian” and everything to do with trying to be a good person.  I know many a “non-Canadian” who show the same regret & remorse when they feel they’ve done something wrong.

To be able to say you’re sorry falls into the main manners category right next to please & thank you in our house.  We’re all human, and at that we are faulted.  Which means from time to time we’re going to mess up, we’re bound to get things wrong and sometimes people are going to get hurt in the wake of that.  Try as we may sometimes, it’s simply unavoidable.

When we realize we’ve done the wrong, there’s nothing left to do but to apologize, to make reparations and to say we’re “SORRY!”  Sometimes for me, that “I’m sorry” goes just as far in teaching me a lesson as it does healing those whom I’ve hurt.  These days it seems this pertains to my children more than anyone!

I just simply can’t say the same for “my bad”.  It doesn’t repair my hurt feelings, if anything it leaves me feeling worse than before.  In my books it’s bad manners and is yet another symptom of the ugly disease of entitlement that is sweeping through our culture.  Walking around the school yard, listening to the way children engage with parents, teenage store clerks speak to the elderly & full grown adults treat each other leaves me nauseous. 

I don’t know about you but I want more for my children than a life filled with entitlement.  There’s no happiness in feeling like the world owed you something and then let you down.  There’s no comfort in feeling justified to do wrong because they hurt you first and lasting love simply can’t breathe when “I” is so much more important than “you”.

There is however, a satisfaction in earning your way, true love in giving from your heart, and a beautiful healing peace that’s found in a quiet “I’m sorry” as a hurt begins to heal.

**Starbucks Baristas have on more than one occasion written “Corky” on Corey’s cup instead of “Corey”**

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With Halloween finally over with (hallelujah!) we’re now on a clear path straight for THE holiday season.  Sure the year is filled with many holidays, but this is the mother of all holidays, the one that is so significant, so spectacular that it has earned the right to be lovingly referred to as THE HOLIDAY SEASON – Christmas! 

I love the massive celebration of what Christmas really means, the sparkling lights, gingerbread men, Starbucks red cups & Mariah Carey on the radio (every 5 minutes).  When November 1st hits each year I’m a little happier, a little more excited and visions of the holiday fun begin to dance in my head. 

The trouble is, when I pull out my life line – aka my day planner, I also start to feel a little bit of panic.  I have SO many things I have to do, SO many things the kids need to do, SO many gifts to find and SO few hours to get it all accomplished.  It can be overwhelming and I was already starting to think that if I didn’t find a solution quick it was all going to swallow me whole and steal some of the joy out of this holiday season.  

Then I made a discovery – everyone else is just as busy, apparently it’s a “busy-ness thing” and it’s all the rage.  It’s also what can incite Mommy Rage, so…. in an effort to help the people at Shoppers Drug Mart have come up with some holiday solutions!   

To begin with they’ve created a GIFTS MADE EASY online destination that will allow us to sort through hundreds of gift ideas by price, category and/or the type of person you’re shopping for.  (CATEGORIZED LISTS!  Can I get a fist bump from all my Type A organizers out there!)  For me this means being able to go through my list of “to buy for” loved ones, source out what I’m looking for and find it within my budget all before heading out the door, making my shopping a little less stressful and a lot more time efficient. 

I already have some great gift ideas for our “minis” from the Cool Kids & Trendy Tots sections of the online gift finder: 

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  • For my Audrey, there is the LeapFrog My Pal Scout, the perfect companion for her little friend Violet. 

FrozenOlaf

  • For Bethany, the Disney Frozen Olaf, because Frozen and…Olaf.  Do you want to build a snowman? 

TMNT

  • Then I saw the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Combat Gear that I’d love to give to the local toy drive this year.  My brother loved TMNT stuff when we were kids and the idea that some other little boy could be enjoying them just as much makes me all warm and fuzzy! 

 GilletteGiftSet

  • The Modern Man section is going to be great when it comes to my Dad (he who’s affectionately known as “IMPOSSIBLE” to buy for) with a Gillette ProGlide Holiday Pack, Shoppers Drug Mart gift cards and a Sony Micro Hi-Fi Stereo.    

 Hershey's Kisses Milk Chocolate

  • Where Corey is concerned, I might just hit up The Entertainer section, filled with sweets, chocolate treats & Hershey Kisses Milk Chocolate it’s perfect for my sugar loving sweetheart. 

 

From November 12-December 25th, Shoppers Drug Mart will have in-store sales, promotions & exclusive holiday gift sets to help maximize your savings.  They’ll also be launching gift guides like the “Give Beauty, beautyBoutique by Shoppers Drug Mart” which are already available and the “Get Set for the Happiest Holidays” coming on November 15th.  Then keep watching for 3 additional gift guides/beauty books late in November & December for those final stocking stuffers & “oops I forgot” gifts.  And don’t forget the fact that most Shoppers Drug Mart locations are open late and you can earn Shoppers Optimum Points on almost all your holiday purchases.   Meanwhile along the way you’ll also be able to join the conversation at #giftsmadeeasy.  

You’d think with all that awesomeness they’d be done there – but like those crazy infomercials THERE’S MORE!   Except instead of just doubling what you’re already buying, Shoppers Drug Mart has come up with something new & even better – stuff you can win! 

From December 1st to 24th 2014 visit the Shoppers Drug Mart website and play the Unwrap to Win game for a chance to win fantastic prizes from beauty, fragrance, skin care, toy sets, gift cards and electronics.  They’ll be giving away 15 prizes a day with 360 chances for you to win! 

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Finally, to ice the cake, you can head over to Twitter and join in on the #SDMHolidays retweet to win contest for a chance to win 1 of 10 $100 Shoppers Drug Mart Gift Cards. I wouldn’t wait, this contest ends November 21 2014 at 9:00am EST!  You could use them for some of that holiday shopping or maybe for a little “I survived wrapping it all” gift for you! 

You guys, Shoppers Drug Mart has really done an outstanding job of thinking of US this holiday season.  Head over to the GIFTS MADE EASY website, do some shopping, ENTER to win gifts, ENTER to win a gift card and then enjoy the time you’ve saved with your family.  After all, that IS what this Holiday Season is about anyways! 

SDM Gifts Made Easy Logo

Although this post has been generously sponsored by Shoppers Drug Mart, the opinions and language are my own, and in no way do they reflect Shoppers Drug Mart. 

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