Up until recently I have still been able to maintain these ol’ boats with minimal difficulty. However last week when I decided to remove the old flaky polish I discovered that reaching my toes was a new problem. For those of you who aren’t familiar with me or my childhood I have grown up extremely flexable. It was never a problem for me to bend and contort in rather ridiculous looking positions to be comfortable, pick something up or give myself a pedicure. So my current range of motion status…none, was a little hard to swallow.
I spent the weekend debating what to do about this recent problem as these beasts still need some up keep and of course complained to my husband once or ten times. Being the wonderful, attentive man he is, he offered to do the job for me should the need arise. Talk about sweet. What man would volunteer to shove their face in someone’s stinky feet, with stinky nail polish remover and even smellier polish? Mine! I know, I know I rant about how wonderful and perfect he is all the time and I’m sure some of you are gagging as you read but give me a break, I’m in love and we’re newly weds!
I was planning on taking him up on this offer but today my sometimes too big pride won out. “I’m not going to let this growing watermelon get in the way of my vanity!” I thought to myself as I gathered my supplies. I decided to start off sitting in my recliner, it seemed like the best place to start. Well, when leaning only part of the way down emptied my lungs and caused a few dizzy spots to appear I figured I’d better try something else. Floor here I come! That didn’t end any better, in fact I’m sure my lips were a little blue. Next I headed for the kitchen table. Thank heavens I can still get my foot up there. After 5 minutes of twisting, grunting and making the most unflattering faces possible I got one coat done. I was sweating! But none the less I managed this great circus act twice more just to insure the perfect pedi.
I do believe this will be the last self-administered pedicure I get until after our little one makes an appearance. I think I am finally getting the full impact of why vanity and pride are considered sins! Wouldn’t it be just like me to have to learn it the hard way!