Finding Grace in Small Things – The Husband Edition

This past weekend Corey and I were privileged enough to have some time alone.  The girls spent the 2 nights/days with my parents while we attended Christmas parties, shopped and spent time together.

When I crawled into bed last night, our whole little family back together I couldn’t help but look back on the weekend and the years and see all the blessings God has given me in a husband.

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5. He (still) opens car doors.

When Corey and I first began dating I can remember thinking how sweet it was that he’d always open my car door for me, pull out a chair or walk on the road edge.  I loved it and appreciated it but somewhere in my mind I thought the day would come when the “comfortable” part of being together would set in and he would stop.

Nearly 10 years later, that day has yet to come.  No matter how busy we are, how rainy it is, how tired Corey feels he STILL opens my car door and I must say, it means more to me now than it did then.  The days of trying to impress me are long over, and now I can see it wasn’t formality, it was chivalry & it is love.

Kiss

4. The Laugh

I love the sound of Corey’s laugh.  The one that bubbles up when he’s trying so hard to be serious.  It’s the one that I often kill the serious moments with a little of my own breed of stupid just so I can hear it.  The laughter, our laughter is what has helped make this marriage what it is, and I hope we always find the place where it exists.

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This photo was the first time I ever saw Corey.  (We were set up by a mutual friend, thanks Mac!)

3. Grey hair & wrinkles

Just over 10 years ago, on our first date, my arms wrapped around Corey’s waist, zipping across Okanagan lake I saw the first streaks of grey in his hair and I though “so handsome, attractive even”.  Later that night, curled up watching a movie, I looked into his eyes and God gave me my own secret window into the future.  For a split second I felt like I could see his eyes, years from that day weathered from the years, full of love and all I could think was “I need to see those eyes.”

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The grey has multiplied and some of those weathered lines of wrinkles have begun to show and I can’t help thinking, every time I see them how thankful I am that God has allowed me to travel this road with this man.  (ps. They’re also that thing that makes him sexier with each passing year.)

Lean on Me

2. The Arms

In Corey’s arms I have found safety, comfort, strength and intimacy (you may not want to know that but it is an important part of a healthy marriage).  When Corey gives a hug he holds on.  For as long as I need it and he lets go of his hold first.  He’s content to let me take what I need and I love that.

I’m not much for being touched on any level (read: most times being touched by people causes me to feel like I’m suffocating & causes panicked, if not dangerous defense responses) but when it’s Corey it’s so very different.  His arms are my “home” and tucked against his shoulder is my best place.  

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1. His servant’s heart

There is nothing, absolutely nothing I love more about the man I married than the heart God has given him.  It is the heart of a servant.  He is giving and kind, compassionate and patient, soft spoken and sweet, understanding and forgiving – even when the forgiveness is completely undeserved.

At our wedding Pastor Gary talked about serving each other in marriage.  About how being willing to “wash each other’s feet” like Jesus did with the disciples was a beautiful metaphor for marriage.  The willingness to serve your spouse, to put them before yourself and give to them was a key component in a strong marriage. 

Engagement!

I know that might sound a little scary, like one person might be completely depleted and uncared for, but in fact it’s exactly the opposite.  Think about it for a minute – if you’re each humbling yourself and serving the other one, then both parties are being completely loved & taken care of.

Corey heard that message and he has embodied that every day of our lives together.  Sure we’ve had our moments, what married couple doesn’t (heck what long standing relationship doesn’t?!)?  But those moments pale in my memory compared to the good ones.

This man has cared for me, deeply, truly and completely for 10 years and I know, from the depths of my soul how truly blessed I am to call him mine. 

Grace in Small Things is a social network created by Schmutzie to wage a war against imbitterment!  Check out my first post here.